How can I overcome the frustration of dealing with my mother, and what is the ruling on such an act in Islam, and is it considered disobedience to parents (ʿuqūq al-wālidayn)?

Righteousness towards one's mother is an obligation and a means of attaining Allah's pleasure, while disobedience to her is a grave sin and a cause of His wrath.

Allah commanded us to address our parents with respect and gentleness, and forbade us from scolding them or raising our voices at them. Allah Almighty said: "So do not say to them [anything that indicates] disapproval and do not scold them but speak to them a noble word. And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, 'My Lord, have mercy upon them as they nurtured me when I was small.'"

Therefore, it is obligatory to avoid addressing one's mother with a loud voice or an angry tone, as this constitutes disobedience. One can strive against one's ego, seek Allah's help, and increase supplication and remembrance to avoid anger, for good manners are acquired through habituation.

If one's ego overcomes them and something offensive to the mother occurs, despite efforts to please Allah, then we hope for Allah's forgiveness. Allah Almighty said: "Your Lord is most knowing of what is within yourselves. If you should be righteous, then indeed He is ever Forgiving to the oft-returning [to Him]."