Does what is happening to me—my husband's disobedience and his allusions to my past—mean that Allah has not accepted my repentance and is displeased with me, or is it a punishment from Him? And what should I do about my husband's request for unlawful anal intercourse?

If you have repented to Allah with a sincere repentance that fulfills its conditions, then have good expectations of your Lord and beware of despairing of His mercy. Marital problems may be a trial, not a punishment for a sin, so face them with patience and piety. Allah, the Almighty, says: "Indeed, whoever fears Allah and is patient, then indeed, Allah does not allow to be lost the reward of those who do good." If your husband commits forbidden acts such as infidelity, anal sex, or drinking alcohol, then it is obligatory to advise him with wisdom and good admonition. If he repents, then praise be to Allah. If he does not repent, then separation from him is better, and it is recommended for you to seek Khul' (divorce initiated by the wife) from him. It is not permissible to shame a Muslim for a sin, especially if he has repented from it.