Is a wife sinful if she insists on seeking a divorce from her husband who is characterized by extreme nervousness, threatens and breaks furniture, and there is no understanding between them, and he divorces her then takes her back, and she refuses to return to him fearing for herself, and believes that he will not change?

Conditional divorce takes effect according to the majority of jurists if the condition is met, and similarly, divorce during menstruation takes effect according to the majority. What the majority has adopted is the ruling given in fatwas. If the husband chose the opinion that the divorce does not take effect based on an ijtihad (independent reasoning) or a trustworthy fatwa, then there is no harm. However, if it is merely for the sake of seeking concessions, then it is not permissible for him to do so.

He should ask people of knowledge. Otherwise, refer the matter to the Sharia court, as there is a possibility that you have become unlawful to him with the third divorce, and you will not become lawful for him until you marry another husband. Allah Almighty says: "And if he has divorced her [for the third time], then she is not lawful to him afterward until she marries another husband. And if he [then] divorces her, there is no blame upon them both if they return to each other and assume that they will maintain the limits of Allah. These are the limits of Allah, which He makes clear to a people who know." (Al-Baqarah: 230).

Assuming the third divorce did not take effect, the wife has the right to request a divorce if she is harmed, or khul' (divorce at the wife's instance with compensation) if she dislikes staying and fears failing in her obligations to him. However, do not rush and consult wise people.

The husband must treat his wife kindly, in compliance with Allah's saying: "And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good." (An-Nisa: 19). It is important to seek consultation before marriage and perform Istikhara (prayer for guidance), and to beware of anger by following the prophetic guidance.