How can one overcome emotional attachment to a religiously uncommitted fiancé and draw closer to Allah Almighty to fill the heart with His love alone, while not knowing the limits of interaction with him during the long engagement period?

A Muslim must protect their heart from the whispers of Satan and from attachment to anyone other than Allah. Any relationship between an unmarried young man and woman is forbidden before marriage, and it must be severed, and repentance sought for it. Private seclusion with a non-mahram woman is forbidden, for Satan is the third party between them. A friendship relationship between a man and a woman outside the bonds of marriage is reprehensible and is considered a form of general zina (fornication/adultery). The continuation of forbidden relationships leads to 'ishq (passionate love/infatuation), which is a malady that opens one up to trials and corruptions, such as preoccupation with the love of a creature instead of the love of Allah, and the distraction of the heart from the concerns of religion and worldly life. A person is afflicted with this malady due to their ignorance and heedlessness of Allah.

For treatment, one must know the oneness of Allah and His signs, and contemplate His punishments. One must frequently reflect upon the signs of Allah and His names and attributes to realize His greatness, which cultivates a sense of His constant watchful presence and modesty before Him. One must increase in outward and inward acts of worship, such as maintaining the five daily prayers, performing night prayers, frequent fasting, resorting to Allah with supplication, and constant remembrance of Him.

A suitor is a non-mahram to his fiancée until the marriage contract is concluded. Therefore, private seclusion with her is not permissible, nor is touching her, or speaking about matters of love or marital intimacy. It is permissible to speak with her out of necessity, with Islamic controls, such as the presence of a mahram or via telephone, provided that the conversation is in accordance with good conduct and without softness in speech.

It is recommended to choose a righteous, religious spouse, adhere to Islamic controls during the engagement period, and then expedite the marriage.