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Is the dowry (shabaka) the right of the suitor if he cancels the engagement after a month and a half, and he was unable to see the fiancée before the engagement to get to know her?

1 min readAlso available in العربية

It is permissible for the suitor to see the woman he proposes to, in order to sustain affection, and this can be done without the woman's knowledge. Information about the prospective fiancée can be obtained by asking those who know her. However, the common form of interaction that involves immodest display (tabarruj) and seclusion (khalwa) is forbidden, as the suitor is considered a stranger to his fiancée until the legal marriage contract is concluded. It is forbidden for the suitor to talk to his fiancée on the phone, or to be alone with her, or to take her with him alone, or for her to sit with him and his family while her face is uncovered. If the "engagement jewelry" (al-shabaka) is part of the dowry, it must be returned to the suitor if the engagement is broken, and likewise if it was a gift, because it falls under the category of a gift given with expectation of recompense (hibat al-thawab). In case of dispute, the matter should be referred to the judiciary.

Summarized from the full answer at Ftawy · reviewed Sep 2, 2026

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