What is the ruling on repeatedly swearing an oath of divorce in a state of anger, and does the divorce take effect if the wife or children do not adhere to what was sworn upon?

The majority of scholars hold the view that swearing an oath by divorce—whether intended as an actual divorce, a threat, a prohibition, an incitement, or an affirmation—results in the divorce taking effect if the oath is broken. This is the prevailing fatwa with us, contrary to the view of Sheikh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah, who opined that swearing an oath by divorce, when it is not intended to be a conditional divorce but rather a threat or an affirmation of a matter, takes the ruling of an oath sworn by Allah. Thus, if the oath is broken, the swearer is obligated to offer an expiation for an oath (kaffarat yamin), and no divorce occurs.

Accordingly, the prevailing fatwa with us is that if your wife left the house in a manner that you prohibited her from in your oath, then her divorce has occurred. Similarly, her divorce has occurred due to the children going to school after you swore an oath upon them not to go.

If you have broken another divorce oath, then three divorces have occurred, and your wife has become irrevocably divorced from you (baynunah kubra). You cannot take her back unless she marries another husband—a marriage of genuine desire, not a tahlil marriage (a marriage entered into solely to make a previous divorce permissible)—and that husband consummates the marriage with her, then divorces her, or dies, and her waiting period (iddah) from him expires.

Therefore, fear Allah the Almighty, repent to Him, and avoid swearing oaths by divorce, for it is considered among the oaths of the dissolute. Some scholars have even gone so far as to prohibit swearing oaths by divorce.

What we recommend is that you present your case to a trustworthy scholar whom you can speak with directly, one whose piety and knowledge are reliable, and then act according to their fatwa.